Wednesday, May 10, 2006

The Impending World Cup

World Cup fever is getting ready to descend on the country. *big sigh*

I'm not sure I can handle the inevitable crushing disappointment. The tournament will go something like this:

1)England's injury crisis will continue to worsen.
2)England will struggle in the early stages against the might of Trinidad & Tobago while retaining an unshakeable confidence that we can win the tournament.
3)England will qualify for the group stages, just.
4)Cue near hysteria in the British media as normally sensible journalists and sports broadcasters start enthusing about how the team is "bringing football home" and that this year is the best chance of winning since we last won in 1966.
5)England will face an 'old enemy' e.g Germany, Argentina etc. The team will JUST about scrape a win on blood and guts.
6)The British media will move up to a higher level of hysteria and hyperbole.
7)England will crash out in the quarter-finals (probably on penalties - Steven Gerrard will miss one and Pizza Hut will be on the phone immediately )to either Brazil or any country with a tactically astute manager.
8)Recriminations will begin. Sven Goran Eriksson will finally leave.
9)The whole process will begin again for the European Championships in 2008

Maybe I'll start watching Crown Green Bowls instead. Then at least I don't have to be constantly worrying about Wayne Rooney's metatarsal, Michael Owen's bionic foot or Rio Ferdinand's inability to concentrate for more than 45 minutes....

Oh, who am I kidding.....?


(You know, I think this is our best chance to win since 1966....)

The inside of Michael Owen's bionic foot

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